Are you a flowchart thinker?

I am assuming many of you know what a flowchart is. If you are new to flowcharts, Google them. I am pretty sure you will find volumes of information about them.

Flowchart is an amazing model for communicating or defining a process or a bunch of activities interrelated with each other. It can clearly depict the sequence of activities, dependencies among them, best route possible, the decision points etc. Beginning at the start node, a reader can follow the path towards the end node making the necessary decisions along the way. A well drawn flow chart covers all the possibilities and leaves no scope for any grey areas.

I’ve learnt, through rather painful experiences :), that whenever you are delegating a bunch of tasks to a team of people, you always have to give directions for all possible situations that may be encountered in the course of carrying out those activities. The usual mistake that people make, which I made in the past, are that you assume that everything will go well, as planned, and hence provide the directions for the best case or the sunny day scenario. But more often than not, things screw up. Unforeseen circumstances arise. Exceptions occur. Then the team gets confused about the necessary action to take.

If you are delegating tasks to a team, follow this thumb rule. Picture a flow chart in your mind. At each activity node, think of the sunny day and the rainy day scenarios. Think of the necessary action to take under such situation. Narrate or communicate this flowchart to the team. By doing this, you will never leave any unclear areas and the communication to the team will be picture perfect. The rest is up to the team to carry forward the activities.

Is communication more than just speaking and listening?

Believe me, speaking and listening forms only half the job while the body language fills the rest. We come across this in our daily life. We can easily understand if the other person is interested in the conversation or the proposal just by looking at his/her gestures. Even a simple gesture like looking away every now and then will send out a signal that the other person is not interested in the conversation.
Its not just about conversations.

Suppose you are presenting a proposal to a group of customers. Following could be some of things that give you a signal that you are going the right direction:

• The customers are asking the right questions
• They are asking for more information on your proposal
• Some lively jokes in the room
• Having fun and at the same time staying focused on the conversation.

These are few things that scream for some attention on your part:

• Customers fidgeting on their chairs.
• Repeated glances at the watch
• People moving in and out. Taking phone calls during the session.
• People typing away on their laptops, not listening to you while you are presenting.

It is clear from the above that even simple things like glancing at your watch can have an impact on the situation. It is important to behave well when the stakes are high.

Rule 1. Everyone likes confident people. Be confident.
I am sure you agree with me too. The moment you are confident you have won half the war. I am not referring to just a show of confidence but a real one. Real confidence comes from good preparation. When we have facts on our fingertips, it is easy to confront any type of people. We are like soldiers equipped with different kinds of weaponry and we are ready for war.
Confidence in self brings out the very best behaviour out of us. It becomes easy to get a buy-in from others.

Rule 2. Plan well. Prepare well. Rule the game.
Plan ahead of time. Think of all possibilities. Prepare well for all the possible situations and questions. I have never seen a well prepared person failing to meet the expectations.

Rule 3. Look your very best always. Pay attention to your dressing and accessories.
People judge others first by their looks. Simple things like well groomed hair, neatly pressed clothes and shining shoes can speak volumes about the person’s character. It’s always suggested to take good care of these small things that may have a huge impact on others. Every single thing like this will add up to that coveted 100% success factor.

Simplicity beats complexity …

Be crisp. Be clear. That’s the easiest and the best way to communicate. We need to be clear about what we need to speak and convey it using the best combination of words so that the message is delivered. Long sentences embellished with flowery words go well in movies and not so much in real life.

Observe this conversation:

Jack: I think the shipment may get delayed. Well, at the moment it seems so. Or maybe it may arrive on time but not sure about that. I just heard from the cargo department that the vessels didn’t start yet from Singapore due to harsh weather. I am doubtful if we will be able to deliver the goods to the customer on the agreed date. But I don’t want to call him up and let him know as I am not sure if it will really get delayed.

David: Well, I think its best to keep the customer informed about the situation, so that he will be prepared for the possible delays. I am sure he will understand the situation.

As you may have noticed, Jack is more verbose while talking and is not clear in his mind about the plan of action. On the other hand, David is clear in his thoughts and crisp in expressing himself. Better clarity of thought will bring out the right sentences.

Overly verbose sentences may deviate the attention of the audience and may not achieve the required impact. Unless you are in a friendly chat with others, it always helps to think before we speak and to choose the correct words.

So here is the rule. KISS – Keep It Simple, Stupid.

You don’t need to impress people with long flowing sentences filled with words popping straight out of the dictionary. Just put it in a clear and clean fashion. You will automatically impress people.

Master the Art of Breaking the Ice .. and You Will Never Look Back ..

Almost everyone agrees that the first few moments of any meeting with a stranger are the toughest to get by. We don’t know the other person. We don’t know anything about his/her attitude, cultural background and interests. Not to mention the butterflies in the stomach. Many barely survive these awkward moments.

For a successful communicator, this is the first challenge to beat. For someone who is picking up on communication skills, the first few ice-breaking sessions may be a bit clumsy. But with experience, it becomes fairly easy to start conversations with complete strangers. It becomes a natural trait. After a good amount of practice, it becomes so normal that one wouldn’t even feel that he/she is trying to break the ice. You just do it.

From my personal experiences, I observed that if I didn’t break the ice with someone in the first meeting, it becomes increasingly difficult to initiate a conversation with that person in the second meeting as we both know that we have met in the first meeting but went through the awkward moments of just glancing at each other every now and then without speaking a word. After a series of such not-so-good experiences, I realized that mastering the ice-breaking art is the first step towards progress.

I started observing the people in the parties, read self-help books and watched loads of movies (Drama will help. Not action or horror. You need some dialogues). Then I kicked myself out of my comfort zone and started meeting new people at work, at parties, at restaurants etc. Gradually it became so natural that initiating a conversation is no longer a conscious attempt. You can take the challenge to the next level by breaking the ice with the opposite sex. I’m sure you will agree that doing this at work is easy but not so much at parties or other social events. But believe me, all we need is confidence and things will flow smoothly.

Now let’s get to the question of how to break the ice. Depending on the context, choose a right ice-breaker. By context, I mean the location, the event, the purpose etc. For example, if I were to speak to someone outdoors, I’d say something related to the weather. Something like the following:

‘Warm day today ..’

‘ yeah… but I’m sure it will get colder in no time…’

‘yeah… we know how the weather is like in this city ………. how is your day going? ’

You see …. It’s not too difficult after all…

The other day I entered a lift along with one of our customers. I know the other guy but he didn’t know me. I wanted to introduce myself. We both had to go to the ground floor from 5th. The lift took us to the ground floor in a flash. I was surprised by the speed of the lift and said ‘Boy, that was quick… looks like this is some kind of an express lift’. He laughed and said ‘yeah, these lifts are pretty quick … it’s a free fall experience every time…’. I laughed and continued the conversation, ‘By the way, I’m ….’

At work, it is much simpler and the chances of successful ice breaking are better than at social events. One can directly walk up to the other person and introduce oneself.

To summarize, follow these simple rules and there is no looking back:

1. Prepare yourself for the challenge
2. Kick yourself out of the comfort zone and volunteer for ice-breaking
3. You may fail initially but remember that every failure is a stepping stone to
success
4. Do it every single time there is an opportunity. After a while, it becomes a
natural trait.
5. Believe me, it’s fun. See yourself transforming over time. Go for it.